Making Christmas better.....

the older I get... the less I've been liking Christmas....

sometimes reading other people's blogs with photos of all of their family time together just hurts...

it reminds me of a time in MY life.... when Christmas morning, the kids would wake up to having dad and mom both in the same house.....

there was no " hurry up and eat, I have to take you home" on Christmas.......

There was never the sad dread of having to say goodbye to your kids as you dropped them off at their "other" parent's house......

there was never the thought of comparison... wondering if what YOU got them was equal to what their other parent got them....

there was never a tussle for time with the kids..... we lived together... we WERE a family....

so when things like this, start to threaten the thread of happiness that Christmas brings...... or used to bring, a sadness settles in on your soul that pretty much blackens the joy...... it takes away from the celebration of Jesus, and makes you grumpy.... frustrated..... sad..... miserable.... lonely beyond belief..... and really wondering how God is ever going to make Christmas happy again....

my friend Tom is going through his first divorced Christmas this year..... as he and I were emailing back and forth today.....he said something very profound....

This is my first"Divorced" Christmas and I probably need to make concerted efforts to ensure it's a good one...I think the Lord wants that from me. Pray for me, would Ya?

Then he shared this quote with me......

"The years that lie behind you, with all their struggles and pains, will in time be remembered only as the way that led to your new life. But as long as the new life is not fully yours, your memories will continue to cause you pain. When you keep reliving painful events of the past, you can feel victimized by them...."

Henri Nouwen, (The Inner Voice of Love)

Tom, quite obviously.... is gonna make it!

Thank you Tom .... you just made Christmas better for me!