Still rambling

Sunday, June 20, 2010

Fathers Day.......








I've been pondering a lot this week... trying to get my mind around what makes a good dad.... What is it, that makes a dad successful???

As I've mulled on it, a lot, my mind inevitable returns to thinking about my dad.... and all of the qualities in him that I see, that I like.... and that , flat out, I'm trying to emulate.
So Dad.......... here are some of the things I've thought on this week........ all of which you are!
* A successful dad is.....
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one that is always watching for us..... Dad does that well... not just watching OUT for us... but watching for us!
I remember when we would make the trip to visit my grand parents in Quebec.... we would pull in to the driveway of their apartment, and we would see the outline of my grampie in the upstairs window.... watching.... waiting!! He would be to the bottom of the stairs before we would be out of the car!!

My dad is like that... when we go to visit mom and dad in Belleville, inevitably it's late at night when we arrive.... the outdoor light is always on... the door is usually ajar.... and before we are to the door, Dad is up, and waiting by the door to welcome us!
* A successful dad is ...
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someone with whom you can share your victories AND your defeats....
The day I lost my job in 2003, the first person I called was my dad.... At the end of a really good day, I often find myself texting my dad, to brag about how many inspections I'd completed today...
When Taylor got his first job, when Anna got accepted to University, when Abby's photo made it to the Habs website....I was quick to message my dad and tell him....

There's just something about having Dad there to share those things with, that is irreplaceable!
A Successful dad is....
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Someone that always shows up to watch your games. I don't think there was ever a hockey game, or band concert, that my dad didn't show up for..... It's a tradition that lives on with him....
Even Isaac knows this.... one night when Isaac was around 4, he was dreaming big... making plans to play for the Belleville Bulls..... He said to his mom " Mommy, if I play for the bulls, will you come and see me??? Papa will... he ALWAYS comes!!!"
that kind of "always there" is what makes you successful dad!!
A successful dad is ....
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someone that bails you out on a bad day.... I remember years and years ago, one Friday night, I stopped in at a car dealership to dream ....
I had my heart set on owning an Oldsmobile Cutlass Supreme.... ( I still kinda want one!! maybe someday! ) ....
anyway, I was just dreaming.... but the salesman was smarter than me!!! I asked the guy - what did he think was their bottom dollar.... my naivety was my undoing... long story short, the guy talked me out of my ownership, AND my signature, all in an effort to "see" what the best deal was we could get from the boss.....
sigh.........
Saturday morning, My dad and I went back to the dealership to get my ownership AND my pride.......we left with only the ownership!!!!
....... that was more than 20 years ago, and it still embarrasses me... but BOY was it nice to have my dad bail me out!!
A successful dad is.....
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someone that is quoteworthy!!
The older I get, the more I quote my dad.......
"a fool and his money are soon parted"
"get the hay in while the sun is shining"
"small things amuse small minds"
"busier than a one armed paper hanger with a seven year itch"
"The wind bloweth where it listeth, and thou hearest the sound thereof, but canst not tell whence it cometh, and whither it goeth"
Dad was actually quoting scripture there, but he used it in reference of people who ramble onnnnnnnnnnnn and on and on, just to hear themselves talk!!
I find myself quoting my dad all the time!! and thats a good thing!
A successful dad is....
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a dad that has good habits, for his kids to follow....

My dad is a non drinker, and a non smoker... to quote my dad ( again! )
"I don't smoke, I don't chew... I don't go with girls that do!!!"
I remember dad being asked one time why he didn't ever "drink" .. he said " I came dangerously close to being hooked on Pepsi..... Imagine if it had been alcohol"
I love that, and I love your discipline Dad!
Another of your habits is your faithful church attendance! You put us all to shame at how diligently you attend church and how your life honors the one you go there to worship!
A Successful Dad ....
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is someone with work ethic....
My dad is a tank when it comes to work ethic!! I tell people " My dad is semi retired.... now he goes in to the office at 8:30 instead of 7"
At 71, he is still working more hours in a week than most anybody I know.....
when I grow up, I want to have that kind of work ethic!
A successful Dad..........
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is someone that loves my mother......
And dad has done that and continues to do that..... As I watch my mom and dad grow older, the shopping trips consist less of trips to Home Depot and Canadian Tire... and more of trips to Shoppers Drug Mart..... and I've watched dad consistently, for 47 years, drop what he's doing and rush to make sure mom has all that she needs.....
I can't, in a million years, ever expect to come close to that....
A Successful Dad.....
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is one that loves his grand kids as much as he loved us.
As I have watched 8 grandchildren come and go through mom and dad's house, I have seen a consistent theme: A loonie here, a toonie there, a hug and tickle , and a shoulder that every one of those kids felt safe snuggling on!
"The true measure of a man, is how you are made to feel in his presence"
If the way your grand children feel around you was the ONLY indication, you are an incredible man!
To quote my Dad again,.... "If I'd known grand kids were this much fun, I'd have had them first!!"
The truth is, dad.... You are a great Dad.... an Incredible husband, a true friend, and a very Godly man.....
and I love you very much!

Some days, I find it a staggering example to follow, and yet I strive to, because I want to be THAT KIND OF DAD, to my kids.
Someone said that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.......
I keep saying.......... When I grow up, I want to be just like you!
I'd not want you to feel flattered, but I sure do want you to know that I'm proud to be your son, and proud to call you my dad.

Happy Fathers Day Dad!







































































1 Comments:

At August 06, 2010 4:55 p.m. , Blogger Gordon said...

There are a couple reasons why it is indeed very sad thing when others have to maintain a blogsite for someone else. First, it can be very difficult to craft a blog that is anywhere near as interesting as those written by Mr. Mackay or Big M, as he close friends like to refer to him since he loves Big Macs. That reminds me of a story where Paul was good enough to invite me out for dinner and I looked forward to that Keg-sized prime rib. Much to my surprise, rather than going to the Keg, we found ourselves at MacDonalds. I said “you can’t be serious” to which he just smiled, giggled and looked straight ahead. He told me I could order whatever I wanted as long as I kept it under $6. I was impressed. Last time, he put a cap of $5 on our meals. Anyways, we ordered and sat down. Paul did grace, as he always does but this time he thanked God for Ronald and even said a quick prayer for him. I was touched, but not by him. Thankfully. Funny thing about having Macdonald’s with Paul, the fries are always greener on the other side of the table. Not sure why it is but it is s good thing I supersized the order because by the time he was done, I barely had a regular order of fries. He surprised me when he offered to buy a desert. I looked at him rather oddly and then it dawned on me. He meant dessert so I agreed. We ordered our dessert, which in my case included nuts. Do you ever notice that Paul has a tough time talking about nuts? He has the same issue when talking about balls. But I digress. Anyways, it was a very generous offer by Paul but if he ever invites you for dinner, you may want to ask him where he is thinking. I asked him afterward why McDs and he said he spent most of his “extra” cash at the corner store buying “educational” material. Not sure what he meant but neither did I want to know.

The second reason it is a sad thing because it clearly shows an inability to show commitment. Heck, if you can’t commit to a blogsite, how are you going to commit to a friendship? Do you ever notice that when you try to call him, he seldom answers the phone, unless your female of course. If you don’t make an effort to contact him once in a while, you probably won’t hear from him. Just last month , we arrived back from a vacation only to receive a panicked text that said “Hey man, you still alive?” Now think about that. If I never got the text and let time roll along until I one day when I would send him a text, would he ask “Hey man, you back amongst the living?” Paul does like his texting but not always the most eloquent when it comes to what he says. Frankly, I don’t think those educational materials are working for him. Perhaps they have too many pictures and not enough stories. Strangely, I visited his place once (I have known Paul for about 10 years and I have been invited over a grand total of once…hmmm) and he and Jenny shared their supper, which was very nice. Leftovers from the Mandarin I think. Anyways, we sat down afterwards and, well, while they were doing the dishes, I thought I would look at one of his educational magazines but he must be clumsy and spill a lot because a lot of the pages were stuck together. Perhaps I should get him a subscription for Christmas.

Finally, what none of us can do is capture photos quite like Paul. Well, only if you exclude the webcam photos he took of himself. Just frightening. He does seem to have a keen eye. Gotta love the photo of the car with the cane still hanging on the side mirror. That is classic. His father doesn’t think so and says it wouldn’t have happened if he didn’t get so flustered the last time Paul came for the weekend.

In a nutshell Paul, we like your stories and hope that this long period of silence will culminate (repeat after me Paul cul-min-ate) in some wonderful musings and stories.

gord

 

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